I thought the walls of my home were strong enough. As the General Contractor, I built them to
last. They were seemingly built on a
foundation of correct principles and righteous desires. When the walls showed any sign of weakness I
diagnosed and treated the problem with a good dose of indignation. Slowly the cracks became so deep, my
principles, determination and hope could no longer withstand the weight, and my
home collapsed.
It was confusing standing among the rubble. How could it have fallen? I followed the
plan. When I looked back at the
blueprints there was no room for error.
So why? Why did it fall
apart?
I couldn’t just stand around waiting for answers. I had a home to
rebuild, so I got to work.
First on the list, was reexamining the foundation.
Helaman 5:12 teaches, “it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is
Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil
shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when
all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over
you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock
upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if
men build they cannot fall.”
More confusion. Our
family foundation was built upon the rock of Christ, so why did it not
withstand the mighty winds? Turns out
the only foundation that matters is my own.
Naively, I believed I could build a foundation big enough and strong
enough for all five of us. I painstakingly
tore out the shallow, giant slab and went to work strengthening and deepening
my own foundation, while helping the
kids pour their own.
When it came time for reframing, I was smacked in the head
with a 2x4. The problem with the first
home wasn’t the plan. The plan was, and
still is, perfect. The problem was
me. At some point along the way I
decided I was the General Contractor. I
referenced the blueprints, but I chose how our family was going to be
constructed. Each brick was in the right
place, but I didn’t follow the architect. I didn’t follow the Savior, to ensure the
detailed mason work was done correctly.
From a distance, my home looked like the blueprint, but the construction
was sloppy. It wasn’t built with nearly
the kind of precision that comes with patience, temperance and charity. So, I did something I should have done a long
time ago; I fired myself.
I invited Christ to take the lead in constructing my
new home. Of course there are times, I
still get in His way. Foolishly, I
believe I know better and can handle it on my own. But then He sweetly reminds me that a
bulldozer is not needed when installing flooring. He puts his arm around my shoulder and says,
“Come on Sweetie, let me show you a better way.”
As we are going through this process together He has taught me no matter how perfect my plan is, no
matter how prepared, and organized, sometimes things just fall apart. BUT, He is always there to help me
rebuild.
